Create a different story

Kevin Roth is a Life Coach but started his career as a dulcimer player and musician in 1974. By 2015 he had worked on around 50 albums, sung the theme to a children’s hit TV show Shining Time Station that was based on the stories of Thomas the Tank Engine and developed a children’s music career.

Everything was going well when in 2015 he was diagnosed with Stage 3 Melanoma and given around 2 years to live. It was a sentence he didn't agree with so he decided to change the story and moved from Kansas to California to live a bohemian lifestyle in a beautiful place. After a couple of turbulent years dealing with the diagnosis, someone suggested to him that he should become a life coach, something he didn't know anything about. Initially it didn’t appeal to him, but he found a way to teach the dulcimer in a meditative style and become a life coach in his own way using spirituality and science to talk to people about understanding life, dropping stress and creating a life that they really love.

As a child Kevin was very musical and played piano by ear. At 13 he heard the Appalachian Mountain dulcimer and fell in love with the sound of it and learned to play it. In some places it is still seen as a traditional folk instrument but because Kevin didn’t know about its history he played it like a guitar or piano and came to be seen as a very innovative player. Being seen as doing something different helped in him getting his first record deal with Folkway Records.

Kevin feels that music teaches resilience. Its hard to make a living as a musician and in a business sense music teaches us how to create something out of nothing. It also helps us recover from making mistakes – how do you come back from a bad gig when people don't applaud?  In jazz there are no mistakes just improvisation and often what we class as mistakes are just someone else’s judgement. Kevin also feels that music should be taught in schools like maths and science, the more people who are artistic or musical the better. Everyone can be artistic and the more artistic skills you teach, the better people will be able to do their jobs.

When he got his cancer diagnosis Kevin thought he was in in good health. He now feels that it was the stress in was under the three years prior to the diagnosis that caused it. Stress and inflammation can have a really damaging effect and we have to know how to handle stress and what to eat in balance.  When he was diagnosed Kevin had to think about what was really important  – I only have two years to live so what do I want to do? The fame and fortune didn’t matter anymore what he wanted to do was make music, spend time with his dogs and move to California. He rejected the diagnosis. They removed a lymph node to see if the cancer had spread and then waited a year to see if it had come back and it never did.

Kevin never thought he was going to die, he changed the story. When you realise that nothing lasts or matters and everything passes, you get out of the story of ‘I hate my job or partner and don’t like this or that’ and then when you change the way you look at things the things you look at change. When he had the diagnosis Kevin said he was going to go and watch surfers in California, and wasn’t going to live the rest of his life in a cancer ward. We create stories every day. When we wake up it can be a good day or a bad day. If you’re in a really bad mood and the phone rings and it's a friend you haven’t heard from a while then suddenly you’re in a whole other dimension. All the drama that was ruining your life is gone. When you look at mindful awareness and take the time to contemplate it you realise you that you really shouldn't get upset about very much. The story is the story. Learn to live in balance.

Every day we create a different story. When Kevin wakes up he says this is what I want to do and feel today.  Of course there is a need to eat the right things, to rest and exercise and do some sort of meditation but we need to get out of the illusion that money buys happiness. We also need to recreate our life on a daily basis. We need to retune ourselves through the day. Many people don't know how to sit in silence or be comfortable with themselves any more.  They have lost who they are and are addicted to stress.  We need to drop a lot of the things going on in our heads, be nice to ourselves and give ourselves a break. We have an inner voice that will talk to us if we are quiet enough to listen so we can replace what doesn't work with what does.

There is a balance between planning for the future and learning to live your life now. When you figure out what matters and why, everything else falls into place.

You can listen to the podcast in full and find out further information here. Our upcoming guest list is also available along with our previous blogs.

You can find out more at Kevinroth.org